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Education
The
education of a human being should begin at birth and continue
throughout his life.
Indeed,
if we want this education to have its maximum result, it should
begin even before birth; in this case it is the mother herself
who proceeds with this education by means of a twofold action:
first, upon herself for her own improvement, and secondly,
upon the child whom she is forming physically. For it is certain
that the nature of the child to be born depends very much
upon the mother who forms it, upon her aspiration and will
as well as upon the material surroundings in which she lives.
To see that her thoughts are always beautiful and pure, her
feelings always noble and fine, her material surroundings
as harmonious as possible and full of a great simplicity -this
is the part of education which should apply to the mother
herself. And if she has in addition a conscious and definite
will to form the child according to the highest ideal she
can conceive, then the very best conditions will be realised
so that the child can come into the world with his utmost
potentialities. How many difficult efforts and useless complications
would be avoided in this way !
Education
to be complete must have five principal aspects corresponding
to the five principal activities of the human being: the physical,
the vital, the mental, the psychic and the spiritual. Usually,
these phases of education follow chronologically the growth
of the individual; this, however, does not mean that one of
them should replace another. But that all must continue, completing
one another until the end of his life.
We
propose to study these five aspects of education one by one
and also their interrelationships. But before we enter into
the details of the subject, I wish to make a recommendation
to parents. Most parents, for various reasons, give very little
thought to the true education which should be imparted to
children. When they have brought a child into the world, provided
him with food, satisfied his various material needs and looked
after his health more or less carefully, they think they have
fully charged their duty. Later on, they will send him to
school and hand over to the teacher the responsibility for
his education.
There
are other parents who know that their children must be educated
and who try to do what they can. But very few, even among
those who are most serious and sincere, know that the first
thing to do, in order to be able to educate a child, is to
educate oneself, to become conscious and master of oneself
so that one never sets a bad example to one's child. For it
is above all through example that education becomes effective.
To speak good words and to give wise advice to a child has
very little effect if one does not oneself give him an example
of what one teaches. Sincerity, honesty, straightforwardness,
courage, disinterestedness, unselfishness, patience, endurance,
perseverance, peace, calm, self-control are all things that
are taught infinitely better by example than by beautiful
speeches. Parents, have a high ideal and always act in accordance
with it and you will see that little by little your child
will reflect this ideal in himself and spontaneously manifest
the qualities you would like to see expressed in his nature.
Quite naturally a child has respect and admiration for his
parents; unless they are quite unworthy, they will always
appear to their child as demigods whom he will try to imitate
as best he can.
With
very few exceptions, parents are not aware of the disastrous
influence that their own defects, impulses, weaknesses and
lack of self-control have on their children. If you wish to
be respected by a child, have respect for yourself and be
worthy of respect at every moment. Never be authoritarian,
despotic, impatient or ill-tempered. When your child asks
you a question, do not give him a stupid or silly answer under
the pretext that he cannot understand you. You can always
make yourself understood if you take enough trouble; and in
spite of the popular saying that it is not always good to
tell the truth, I affirm that it is always good to tell the
truth, but that the art consists in telling it in such a way
as to make it accessible to the mind of the hearer. In early
life, until he is twelve or fourteen, the child's mind is
hardly open to abstract notions and general ideas. And yet
you can train it to understand these things by using concrete
images, symbols or parables. Up to quite an advanced age and
for some who mentally always remain children, a narrative,
a story, a tale well told teach much more than any number
of theoretical explanations.
Another
pitfall to avoid: do not scold your child without good reason
and only when it is quite indispensable. A child who is too
often scolded gets hardened to rebuke and no longer attaches
much importance to words or severity of tone. And above all,
take good care never to scold him for a fault which you yourself
commit. Children are very keen and clear-sighted observers;
they soon find out your weaknesses and note them without pity.
When
a child has done something wrong, see that he confesses it
to you spontaneously and frankly; and when he has confessed,
with kindness and affection make him understand what was wrong
in his movement so that he will not repeat it, but never scold
him; a fault confessed must always be forgiven. You should
not allow any fear to come between you and your child; fear
is a pernicious means of education: it invariably gives birth
to deceit and lying. Only a discerning affection that is firm
yet gentle and an adequate practical knowledge will create
the bonds of trust that are indispensable for you to be able
to educate your child effectively. And do not forget that
you have to control yourself constantly in order to be equal
to your task and truly fulfil the duty which you owe your
child by the mere fact of having brought him into the world.
February 1951
- The Mother
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